What is the Narcissistic style of parenting?
Narcissistic parents are dangerously possessive about their kids. The child is like a puppet in the hands of his parents. The parent treats the child as if he exists solely to fulfill his parents’ wishes and is treated as an extension of their identity. The achievements and failures of the child are viewed as not of the child but that of the parent. In such a scenario, they set extremely high expectations not because they want the child to do well in life but because to fulfill their own wishes and dreams. These are people obsessed with themselves – no one else matters – it’s all about them. They can be extremely strict, tend to get irritated very easily and have an incessant desire to control the child.
Characteristics of this particular style
- Manipulative parents who can go up to any extent to influence their child’s actions and reactions. The child is made to undergo guilt trips. There are rewards and punishments but all done manipulatively.
- Criticism and shaming is abound –even praises are accompanied by a negative comment
- Always ready to blame someone else even the child. No matter what, these parents do not take responsibility for anything.
- There is a great deal of mismatch between what they say and what they finally do. They never walk the talk.
- They are threatened by their child’s potential and talent and would do anything to put him down and hurt his confidence.
- These parents are unreasonably judgmental and draw up unwarranted comparisons.
- These parents indulge in lots of show-offs and have attention seeking tendencies and more often than not parade their offsprings as trophies and material possessions.
- They expect their kids to make unreasonable sacrifices and coerce the child in thinking that he needs to forgo of his own happiness and desires in order to support his parents.
Impact of Narcissistic Parent on Child’s Self image
- Kids of such parents suffer from very low self-esteem. The insecurities of the parents give birth to depleting levels of self-confidence in the child.
- The inflated ego of the parents often leads to the child developing a superior complex turning him into a superficial and shallow person.
- Since such kids have faced emotional coercion to a great extent and love is shown more as a manipulative technique rather than a natural emotion, the kids are emotionally underdeveloped.
Impact of Narcissistic Parent on Child’s Social Skills
- Lack of empathy and affection from the parent affect these kids and bring s out the worse in them – they either grow up to be fiercely selfish, or they turn out to be loners and avoid people, or they tend to develop a false persona and hide their true self and feelings.
- Narcissistic parents are jealous of their child making friends with others thereby limiting him from doing so.
Impact of Narcissistic Parent on Child’s Academics
- Since these parents are self-absorbed they pay no attention to the proper rearing of the child. Chances are that the child performs way below his potential because of this negative environment at home.
Impact of Narcissistic Parent on Child’s Life
- These kids are easily attracted to drugs, alcohol, bullying and victimizing.
- Stubborn, selfish, aggressive, distrusting others and an identity crisis is what sums up this child.