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The Journey to her Lost Self: A Mom’s tale

The inflight manager once again made the announcement. This time it was about an hour more of delay in taking off… While Meera was eagerly waiting to get back home to her 6-year-old daughter, after a week of official travel; she was completely at peace with the delays happening due to the unexpected rains in Paris this time around.

Journey to her lost self

No, she was not complaining, she was not cursing and she was not yelling. That was such a big and pleasant change for her – she thought. She was enjoying some extra moments she had on hand and only to herself. In the race of time, hustling between the onerous targets at work, and never-ending house chores, between the spouse who is equally pushed against time, and her daughter who is always longing for her attention & love, she felt she had lost a part of herself.

What is my inner Meera trying to tell me – she sat there thinking and conversing to her own self. Now is the time she thought when she could sit quietly & reflect upon all what has been happening in her life. While she relaxed a bit more in the comfort of her business class seat, she asked for a cup of coffee and started on what she called “The journey to her Lost self”. 

While looking at the water droplets dancing on her window, she tried to smile and enjoy the lovely weather and her coffee. But the question kept coming back to her mind, time and again. The words just flashing in front of her whenever she closed her eyes. The question that her mom asked her the other day – are you happy? She left the reins to her thoughts and let her mind free to go and wander around, she sat there reflecting what is it that she has been feeling every day for the last couple of months. 

The trail of thoughts initiated that night from the plane at Paris airport went straight to her family that she was the closest to – Her husband Tanmay and her daughter Aneira. She remembered all that her husband does to support her so she could get out of the house and work, she felt all the beautiful cards that her daughter keeps painting for her often, she relived all her vacations and the beautiful times they have spent together and she remembered her new house…Her heart filled with gratitude and she felt so blessed with all what she had.

Thinking about everything at work and the progress she has made in the last couple of years added on to her smile. Life has been good at home and at the office. But then a sudden emptiness entered and overpowered her.  It was that little voice from the deep corner of her heart again. The voice that left her pining for something. Longing for something unknown. 

“If life has been so gracious & kind with me, then why am I not happy?” – With this, she started her inner quest to get the answer. 

And at the next moment, she found herself in the middle of her most cherished memories. All the happy times, long strolls in the park, her coffee dates she enjoyed with Tanmay and all the attention she had from the love of her life. She realized she was smiling and remembering the loving times they had spent in college together when the only thing on their minds apart from each other was to study and get good grades. She lived like a carefree bird who just knew how to live and love. She realized how happy she had been in those days. 

So what changed now?

When was the last time Tanmay and she had gone out for a date? When did he look into her eyes and express his love? And when was the last time she prepared and set a romantic meal for him at home? She tried to remember but could not. All this was so part of their lives together before Aneira came into being. She felt the uneasiness inside and tears rolled out of her eyes. She knew exactly what she had been longing for. All the love, attention and Tanmay’s mind-share she earlier enjoyed was completely missing from her life now. What she was living now was a completely mechanized life system which had routines, respect, care, luxuries, success, smiles, and Aneira. Meera had been longing for somethings that were more elementary to her happiness and she resolved to get it all back. 

The cup of nice coffee and the rain outside the window played their part that they were supposed to. The part of facilitating reflection, cultivating newer ideas, bringing new resolutions and injecting new energy.

With the last sip of her coffee and the last announcement by the inflight manager, Meera tucked in her seat belt and started her journey to home and happiness.

Sometimes what it takes is a moment of reflection to get your life answers. Always be connected to your inner voice and hear what it’s trying to say. 

This blog is a part of #BirthdayBlogTrain hosted by Gunjan Upadhyay and Neha Sharma. I would like to thank    Snehal for introducing me to this blog train and would further like to introduce Arushi to share her take on the prompts.

BirthdayBlogTrain

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59 comments

Shubhra Rastogi June 28, 2019 at 7:06 am

A fresh start by listening to the inner voice is always welcome. great writeup! #BirthdayBlogTrain

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 28, 2019 at 7:27 am

Thanks Shubhra…

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Anurag Singh June 29, 2019 at 3:27 am

Oh wow that a nice write up

All the answers of happiness is lies in our past

But you know how hard we try we can not change things

So we have to find new way to be happy

Although memories are precious.

Thank you a very well written story

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:40 am

Thank you Anurag, u are right, change is essential and embracing it is the only way to live life…Thank you for stopping by and appreciating!

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Gunjan Upadhyay June 29, 2019 at 6:38 am

Such a nice read Kushal. Most of the solutions we are looking forward in life are within us and getting time to soak in our inner self is really important to keep it going. Love the write up… hugs

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 5:58 am

Thank u Gunjan…n u r absolutely correct. Lots of Love

Amarjeet Sonia Madaan June 28, 2019 at 7:48 am

A good read.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 28, 2019 at 8:04 am

Thanks Sonia!

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Sindhu Vinod Narayan June 28, 2019 at 7:51 am

This is a great read. Listening to your inner self. A quick rewind of what has been happening sure is to open minds of underlying worries and ways to resolutions.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 28, 2019 at 8:05 am

Absolutely Sindhu… Thank you for reading this…

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Chocoviv June 28, 2019 at 7:55 am

Thank you for sharing!

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 28, 2019 at 8:04 am

Thank you for stopping by…

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Arushi Seth June 28, 2019 at 11:08 am

Lovely write up!! Many times the solution to most problems is listening to your inner self. That gives you the way to go forward and also the confidence to get what your heart desires.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 28, 2019 at 11:10 am

Rightly said Arushi… Something i have experienced many a times… But slowing down and calming down to hear what you inner self is telling solves it… Thank you for stopping by

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PraGun June 28, 2019 at 11:14 am

Lovely talk to her inner self with the first rains. Nature always gives us opportunity to connect with self we just forget to realise it in busy lifestyle. Well said its just a moment of reflection to get answers to our own questions. Nice post.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:59 am

Thank u so much Pragun for encouraging.. 🙂

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Sonam June 28, 2019 at 4:03 pm

lovely .. I believe in self assessment . It is the major solution to all your worries.. And motherhood is overwhelming.. So it absolutelt necessary to calm your nerves and live in the moment

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:58 am

Absolutely agree sonam… Thanks for stopping by.. 🙂

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Noor Anand Chawla June 28, 2019 at 5:33 pm

I really liked this Kushal. Loved how you didn’t infuse excessive drama yet made a strong statement. Keep writing fiction!

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:45 am

Thank You so much Noor, coming from such a polished and proficient writer like you,i think i am gonna write fiction more. Thank you for encouraging!

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Mann June 28, 2019 at 6:17 pm

How nice! Thank God Meera got her moment to think about what’s missing! I just hope she also works to bring their happy together moments back. Great read.🙂

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:44 am

Absolutely Mann, I think she has got her motivation to bring back all the good times… She would def work towards it.

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Snigdha Prusti June 28, 2019 at 6:25 pm

In tough situations ,listening to the inner self is very necessary.. I love the whole write up..

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:43 am

Thank you, Snigdha… This is really. encouraging.. 🙂

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Alpana Deo June 28, 2019 at 9:00 pm

Thats true sometimes, mechanized life becomes a challenging part and the becomes one of the reason of not being happy from within. We all need such quiet moments for self-realization.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:41 am

Thank you Alpana for reading the post. I agree with you completely… 🙂

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Surbhi Prapanna June 29, 2019 at 2:48 am

Wow such a fresh take on prompt, and i Just loved your story. Indeed in today’s fast moving world, we all need sometime and good mood to enjoy the tiny treasures of life. #birthdayblogtrain

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:41 am

Thank you Surbhi…. Absolutely, can’t agree more… I really cherish the time I spend with myself. 🙂

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Neha Sharma June 29, 2019 at 5:05 am

Loved it, Kushal. We all go through such moments in life when we feel lost, even if we have everything around we feel that emptiness inside. And, that’s when having a word with our inner self helps. I do it all the time, the answers which are hard to find in the open world are deeply hidden inside us. We just need to connect with our inner voice. Excellent read!

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:39 am

Thank you Neha… the best part of this story is – I got to meet friends who agree and think on similar lines. We should def chat sometime Neha..

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Aditi Kapur June 29, 2019 at 5:18 am

Wonderful write-up! When we achieve one thing, others fall apart. Life will go the way your priorities decide:)

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 29, 2019 at 5:37 am

Absolutely that is why is essential to maintain that balance especially for us women – work, house, kids, spouse, relatives, friends and then our own self.

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Pragnya Mishra June 29, 2019 at 2:48 pm

Amazing write up Kushal. The message with the story of rediscovering happiness within, without running behind materialistic aspirations is awe-inspiring.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 5:59 am

Thank u Pragnya… It’s heartwarming to know that it has touched the right chord… 🙂

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Swathi June 29, 2019 at 5:07 pm

Such a wonderful read , I loved the message you portray .

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 5:59 am

Thank You Swathi. 🙂

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Manas Mukul June 29, 2019 at 7:11 pm

Nice one. I believe everything is within us. It is upto us as to which voice we want to listen.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 6:00 am

Rightly Said Manas…Thanks for stopping by.

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vijvihaar silja June 30, 2019 at 4:21 am

Loved reading it.. In a tough situation it very much important to listen wat you innerself says.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 6:01 am

You are right… Thanks for reading.. 🙂

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vijvihaar silja June 30, 2019 at 4:40 am

Loved reading it.. In a tough situation it very much important to listen wat your innerself says.

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MeenalSonal June 30, 2019 at 12:01 pm

Kushal, completely agree with you, one need to question oneself more than others to resolve the things in one’s mind. Loved your perspective of Monsoon.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com June 30, 2019 at 1:00 pm

Thank you for appreciating..!

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Snehal June 30, 2019 at 3:00 pm

Being connected to the inner self..that is what we all need despite genders. Nice post

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com July 1, 2019 at 5:44 am

Thanks Snehal… N a valid point men too need to slow down at times and reflect… Thanks for reading this

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Sonia Dogra June 30, 2019 at 3:13 pm

Nice one! Enjoyed reading it.

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com July 1, 2019 at 5:45 am

Thank you Sonia! Coming from you this means a lot! This being my first ever attempt to fiction.

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Deevya June 30, 2019 at 6:40 pm

Self reflection and self discovery can certainly help a person know, understand and find solutions to the toughest queries of life. I’ve experienced it all my life. Often times you get suggestions from people around you to do a certain something in a way and there your inner self keeps telling you that you ought to do it the other way. We end up neglecting our inner voice and turn to what the world says or thinks about it and move forward to realise in the later run that your true voice tried telling you about the right path. But u chose to neglect it and failed.

Loved your post and the way you have written it. 😊

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com July 1, 2019 at 5:45 am

Thank you Deevya! Great to know the post resonated well with you!

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Anks June 30, 2019 at 8:19 pm

What an important message this story delivers. The answers we seek are within ourselves. We just need to clear our mind and be open:.. beautifully written

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com July 1, 2019 at 5:46 am

Hey thanks for stopping by… n i agree completely with you…

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Mahak July 1, 2019 at 5:04 am

I long for such moments of quiet self reflection. Those are the times I really start to appreciate and be grateful for all that I have. Loved your take on this prompt

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singhal.kushal@gmail.com July 1, 2019 at 5:48 am

Thank you Mahak! 🙂

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Disha July 7, 2019 at 8:19 am

We tend to ignore the inner voice in the chaos of daily life and tend to become unhappy. This post is a reminder to stop overthingking and indulge in what the heart wants.

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Shipra Trivedi July 9, 2019 at 3:20 am

This is actually every woman’s story. She is a wife, mother and a professional personality too. And while playing all these roles of her life, she forgets to please her inner self. She tend to ignore her happiness for overcoming the guilt of being away all day. The life partner on the other side, is thought seem helpful but what about emotional support and connect? That is also needed to the keep the moment going.

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Judy July 14, 2019 at 7:36 pm

Well loved the story that you wrote. It is quite relatable to married ladies.

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Bhawna Shah July 15, 2019 at 8:55 am

Your last line was quite impacting, yes we should listen to our inner voice because it has all the solution of your problems. Only we need to listen in a quiet mood and environment.

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Neha Jain July 15, 2019 at 4:34 pm

What a beautiful story, I really loved it. It is really important to hear what your inner feeling says . Happiness is hidden inside you

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Ghazala Naseem July 16, 2019 at 6:07 am

Nice post , this happens with most of the working ladies , they are torn between thier Job and personal life . One needs to find a way out 🙂

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